What you never knew about dating and courting PT1

There are lots of debate and confusion between this two words, "Dating and Courting". Some use it interchangeably. What prompted me to write this was a question a brother asked on his status demanding responses. Is dating the same as courtship? My answer was NO! Dating and Courting are two different things entirely and should never be mistaken as same. I know someone might want to disagree at this point but just follow me as I follow Christ... 😊

According to English Dictionary, Dating is a form of romantic courtship typically between two individuals with the aim of assessing the other's suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship or as a spouse. The result of dating may at any time lead to friendship, any level of intimate relationship, marriage, or no relation.

Dating involves intimate assessment of each other for suitability. In dating, as you can see, there are no certainties or promises. Dating may or may not lead to marriage.

You can also read: Love and Religion

We see the word 'courtship' mentioned in the above definition. Please, let's not forget the word 'romantic courtship' as seen above. Romantic involves romance and romance is an intimate, romantic relationship between two people; a love affair which actually, is only meant for married couples.

So then, what is Courtship? According to the same English Dictionary.

It is the act of wooing in love; solicitation of woman to marriage.

I believe you can see for yourself that there is nothing like romantic or assessing intimately in the above definition of courtship. You should know that when soliciting for something it means you don't have it yet but you are presenting facts to make you convince the judge and the people that you deserve to have what you are asking for and it means that you may have it your way or not depending on the facts presented. In soliciting in a woman's hand in marriage, the fact you need is good character, commitment, seriousness and dedication to prove that you are ready to spend the rest of your life with her not pri marital sex.

Having established the meaning of Dating and Courtship, let's now consider both concepts carefully.

We see that Dating involves sexual immorality which is against God's standards. The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 6:18 "Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that commiteth fornication sinneth against his own body". Dating is a time of indulging in premarital sex and sexual pleasures. "Don't forget that casual sex will result in casual relationship. Strong emotions will not produce strong commitment, just as compromise cannot produce total dedication in marriage " (Pastor Bimbo Odukoya).

While dating is all that, Courtship, according to Pastor Bimbo Odukoya, is a time to build and nurture friendship, commitment and enduring qualities like godly character, virtue, compatibility and integrity without degradation, violation, disrespect, unfulfillment, humiliation and corrosion of God's most valuable resource - the human being.

Sex only cheapens a relationship and breeds suspicion, disappointment, sorrow, stress, emptiness and many other destructive emotions, and will therefore lead to failure and unsuccessful marriages.

It is not impossible to abstain from premarital sex.