What is True Love

WHAT IS TRUE LOVE?

By Peace Wobo

Text Jeremiah 31:3

Long ago the Lord said to Israel:

“I have loved you, my people, with an everlasting love.

    With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself.

John 3:16

“For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. 17 God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him.

Love is not a word that is new or strange to us. We use it and hear it everyday and in most cases we have abused the use of love. Most times we use it to explain how we feel about something or someone. People use love to explain the goodness or positive attachment they have towards somebody. To too many people, true love is just about how they feel towards someone or something.

But, what is True love? True love is not feelings (emotions). Truly, there has to be an emotional component when you are talking about love but love is not emotions. 

If the entire scope of your definition of love to a person or for a thing is just an attempt to express the emotional affinity towards that thing then you are very limited. (Peace Wobo)

When you build your love life towards emotions and feelings, you will never be able to sustain it.

We have believed that love should always give us a positive feeling about someone. 

You feel excited as long as the person's attitude pleases you but anyday you see an aspect of the person that doesn't make you feel positive, you then stop loving the person. 

When you build anything on feelings, you are heading towards failure.

FEELINGS is a word that expresses your 

psychological disposition at any given time.

Feelings are temporary dispositions based on something we consider pleasant or displeasant about someone or something.

Feelings is not an accurate measure of love. Perfect example: (Ammon and Tamar 2Sam 13:1-15)

Clara's story:

Clara was a beautiful girl from a wealthy family. She attends the best School in town. Her parents could afford all she needs, name it; good bag, shoes, phone and books just to make her comfortable. Despite all these, she did not feel fulfilled in life. As she was growing up, she had so many questions about life such as: “Why do people envy? What do people gain when they say derogating words about me? Why am I not having the same story like my school mates who always talk about their parents cherishing them, sitting with them at table, watching TV and playing games with them, even satisfying their curiosity? Nobody seems to love and admire me. Why? Why?” My only companion is always this anti social, illiterate house maid.

One day, a guy in her neighbourhood who has noticed Clara’s loneliness and troubled countenance came to visit her. She initially felt indifferent because it was strange but the guy brought out games, snacks and some flowers for her, the first time she had a glimpse of affection. They continued their friendship. Unfortunately, after three months, Clara visited her friend to disclose to him that she was pregnant. She had the greatest shock of her life as the guy did not only deny being responsible for the pregnancy but also humiliated her. This made Clara sore depressed and eventually committed suicide by taking a chemical she took from her school Chemistry laboratory.

From Clara’s story:

1. The guy made her feel loved for a moment but was it love?

2. Clara could not manage her emotions correctly.

3. Clara was decieved by her feelings and fell for it

4. She was lonely and didn't look for the right person to talk to.

(Story extracted from SU Ikorodu School's Rally Seminar 2021)

Also Read How to have Peaceful Coexistence

"It is important to remember that emotions won't disappear and go away. They will always be there. We must not deny their existence or feel guilty because of them. Instead we are to channel them in the right direction". (Joyce Meyer) in Managing your emotions

HOW? 

First of all, we must understand that;

LOVE has a divine personality, love is a person and that person is God. (1 John 4:16). If we love God, we will obey His commandments. Loving God is the beginning of loving people and you can't love if you don't know Love personally. You can't give what you don't have.

Love is commitment.

Love is a choice! 

Being around the truth does not guarantee liberation, it is the truth you know and have received that brings liberation. 

Everything in life reproduces on the level of relationship. God so loved the world and they were redeemed. A king loved a village girl and she became a queen, the same king hated another queen and she was dethroned. Who likes you, matters a lot.